I don’t exactly know where I would go.

But a strange perception hit me some days ago, and till now I hold it all the same.

I don’t know why? Why?

In the meanwhile, I could not determine how I could do if the ‘bubble’ vanish.

I just do what I should do and, I must seize any chance occurs in my life.

Be Positive and Active.

I know the chance comes accidently and then flies away.

Tired…

似乎很久都没有过的疲惫.

我不坚强么?或者我还能坚持下去么?

我该怎么走?或者这样走下去,什么时候能看到尽头?

不敢回首,真的不敢......

往前直走,也不知道什么时候才是一个好的停靠......

有时候说忙,可是又看到什么结果了吗?

累了,真的,似乎从来就没有这么感觉过...

有太多太多,真的不敢再想下去...

真希望这样的日子能早点儿结束.

Put down the past, and empty those feelings in memory.

Indeed, I don’t know whether or when I would really put down those memory.

Something people will lose eventually, but something else, that is, the important one --- friendship will never fade and vanish. They exist in real life as well as our memory.

People do hope that they will hold those stories for ever, and me too. However, since those should be gone, let it be, naturally. Anyway there is not worthy of regretting because I have paid for it. Someday I recall the past and revisit my memory, perhaps I would get less tears but more smile.

However nowadays, that yearning the story makes me many pains. We all know it will be released with the time, but nobody knows how long it takes.

When somebody is not longer honest to his/her faith, (s)he starts to change his/her mind. Once these things repeat, all of things is beyond remedy. If it is true, space the way for it. Why not?

If not, what means that you did or will do? To express your insists or the so-called faith? Or, to continue bothering and hurting? Funny and joking you are. Room the place for all of you and pay more attention to what should be done at hand.

So anything else you can not understand?

Eh, let bygone be gone. Or empty them if you like.

Please give me a chance to pursue what I like or even I love.

What is reality? Why do they want a phantom reality like that?

Even sometimes, they can not tell the difference what is true and what they want. So no need to say realities.

All is an excuse. For escape from the problems and bothers again.

I can think out or at least I can understand why they choose this way to avoid the troubles.

Times went by and remain go on ahead. I ,however, do not expect when I will quit this game.

Life is a process. During which there is no right or wrong, but chance.

Many times recently I felt that life gave me many painful outcomes.

And sometimes I exactly did not know how to handle.

Even I felt I was a loser. I haven’t ever had this feelings like that.

Facing these couples of conflicts, I even lose my destination.

I can not even study well silently under these pressures. Unexpectedly, the feelings buried in my soul attack me in the way of accident.

If there is no any spark of hope, I will bury it again in memory for the sake of friendship or that so-called.

I can say without any regret that I have paid for what I like even I love in the past.

All has gone; All will be again because the passion does exist.

Life begins when the hope raise up.

I will purse what does exist in my mind. No matter how gray the life will be.

I said I will insist, and I will keep the hope of life.

I indeed expect that the life will give me another chance.A chance for growing up.

I have to say, Many Thanks, My Life.

It’s my honor to know you, to purse and even love.

Sincerely I am grateful to you.

There are many words more than I could put down…

Likewise, there are many affections more than I can say and express…

There are many things more than I can complete…

All is in the wordless.

Uncertainties make me upset this days.

And now receiving a letter from one Professor and her words give me unpleasant.

Twice.

I don’t know what I should insist on.

Again, Bewildering, Confused, Depressive, Eager, … Helpless.

However, what on earth should I bear these things and emotions?

I have no confident at this time to say the same words which I said to my friends the other days.

Indeed, I exactly know that the belief remains here, in my deep soul. And I know it seems so faint.

But considering the situations I have, how can I do, and what would I receive in the end?

This case takes me down, at least at this moment even this month; And during the whole of past year, what I obtained? Now it is a new year, What should I expect?

Uncertainties again.

They disturb everyone’s view and decisions. I am no exception.

Who would like to undertake and sustain these sufferings? And should any one be willing to insist on?

Show Me A Way and Take Me Away.

Today is my St. Christmas Day.

Got up later and Checked my e-mail, I was surprised at an email from Editor.

The familiar name and title, wow... But I did not know whether it was a delight message.

Opened it and found ...... :) Yes.. Many Thanks to the Editor and even more to the Referee(s) - Santa Claus. *_*

Yesterday was Christmas Day. I have not token it for about 6 years. But now it is my St. Christmas Day.

I can't express how grateful I am.

An unexpected gift from transatlantic one gives me more excites.

The tightened nerve can be released for a while.

I expected that the day like today will come. But I don't expect it comes so surprisingly and on this special date. I can't say anything more...... but Joy.

It is the first time. There will be once more I can expect indeed.

Just Do It.

Oh yeah, I thought one saying "Whatever you do is insignificant, but it is important for you that you do it". So Just Do It.

I CAN!

The contents contained here seem have nothing to do with the title, but below 

I will public one clip which I found online. Then you will snoop something.

Furthermore, the full length documentary about Chinese Overseas Students were shown at BTV-5 in winter last year.

That was a cold winter in Beijing, and now is another one.

Sunshine outdoor is very bright and warm, though according to the current status, it seems I can only see the ethereal hope.

Whatever it happens I insist and also will reserve this special experience.

Enjoy it.

   <    

-------------------------------------

不知何时从梦里醒来
眼前的一切会都不明白
身后一片凌乱的脚步
摇摇晃晃也走到现在

 想进却不知该如何迈
想退却又迷惑于遥远的未来
心潮虽还是超起暮落
风过后只能静静地等待

我的心怎能永远一片空白
深深的也是一个苦涩的海
纵然是在
是在封冻季节里
也是一片蔚蓝的汹涌澎湃

-----------------------------------

At the end, Prompt the Confidence and Never Say Never.

真是想找个安静的角落......

感觉啊,很难,一想起准备工作,一想起这一路上,有时候真的要掉泪了.....

可是又有什恶魔办法,这个时侯,也只能自己独自吞下这心酸....

有时候真的怀疑自己怀疑还有没有机会去做我要做的事情!

在音乐中想让自己快乐起来,忘记曾经的痛,曾经的迷茫, 至少我还能看到些许希望.

可是啊,当一切安静的时候,何尝又不是陷入迷茫....

谁能帮助我,我又能指望着谁呢?

用一句话安慰自己:"God helps those help themselves"

But who knows. Certainly I will go on, insist pursuing my beauties.

When all falls into quite state, I must go on. I know maybe all that depends on myself.

My confidence, my positive mind, and most importantly my faith.

I want to say I will not be regretful even if I could not get my goal.

I tried and did all the things required.

The outcomes but who knows I indeed do not care more.

Let all results come and I open my breast to embrace them.

Fate, Faith. I always own them and will cherish what I have and what I gained.

Why bother bothers and argue them too.

Just Do It.

继续工作,继续忍受!

Be Patient with more Confidence and firm Faith!

Sometimes I feel I am a gambler of life, fate, exactly.

I haven't come back for a long time.

I think this is a new and wonderful year, I wanna have a new experience.

I pray for myself.

Pray for all of you having a excellent reap.

First coming back,

first posting.

Missing the past time, my college classmates, my teachers...

more over, the golden times.

Wish them happy and wealthy.

I think this is my last dairy posted on my space.

I have got many many things to do after now. I dont wanna upset any one who have gave me chances to live happiness and leisure. I do also not wanna disappoint myself, I know I haven't finished my work , my dream , my wonderful life. It's time get to do now! And study harder and harder.

There is no doubt that I must finish my study wonderfully and take my advanced education in 3 or 5 years ! I hoped , so I must do it well . Or it 's not like me .

I lost many more chance , so I next time , wanna capture them in time from now on . It 's not a joke ,a word , but a swear ,a  firmness sacrament .

For the thanks of myself , my parents, my teacher and my closed friends , I dont wanna despair them . Only thing wanna I  do is make the most of the time and do my best to finish my job ,and take an advanced education ,maybe abroad  or domestic ! But I wanna go to Princeton University . It is my dream . And I will make it in 3 or 5 years .

So see you in 3 or 5 years.

My soul is freezing for next excitements. And it will flower and highlight wonderfully .

Many thanks for attaching your attention to me in the past .

So long !

And Wish all of you have a wonderful life , wealth and health .

So long , my best friends , my lovely friends . So long ......

Why dont you believe youself?

Give youself more Conident!

Dont hesitate to get high and more activity.

Your chorus are charged in your cuple of HANDS.

Giving up anything else that has nothing with your active.

But Relax and Relax again and

Be more Confident and Enthusiasm!

Enjoying it!

Forget anything when it starts, BUT what you must REMEMBER is that

 the Melody is in your heart.  

Melody is forever......

今天的拔河比赛，我们都努力了。大家在惺忪睡意中挑战了对手，并赢取了胜利的信念。

作为体委，哎，很遗憾的是没有组织好啊！

太愧疚了！各位，辛苦了！！

同时，我看到了大家合在一起，使劲，呐喊，

那股劲才是我们最需要保持的。

不论何时大家都要紧紧的抱在一起，努力，加油。。。

我其实还是意犹未尽啊，没有和大家一起挑战。希望还有下次机会以弥补这次的缺憾。

最后说一声：感谢大家的参与与支持。谢谢啦。

我是输了，失去了也要输得精彩，在失去当中获取更深的意义。
不是说输了就没劲，其实不在于结果，更重要的是这中间的奋斗的过程，这才是唯一的可贵的地方。输了可以再爬起来，再战斗；可是没有了活着的希望和信念，恐怕很难爬起来再继续战斗了。

也许以后能回想起来的就是这不论输赢中间的拼搏的过程，我觉得在失去的时候，回想起来的那些片断，剪影才是更加精彩的，更加让人回味的，也许那时你会更加珍藏，回味的。

我又很久没有这么感叹了，今天是有是一次最好的经历。输了结果但是赢取了过程！这是我最想说的！